The 5 Signs that you are raising a spoiled child
If you give in to your child’s every need or want, this can create a false sense of entitlement which can lead to significant problems later on such as poor relationships, interpersonal conflicts, and depression.
Almost as soon as your child begins to talk she will start asking for things. By the time they reach 3-4 years of age the constant requests for sweets or toys will follow you to every shop you go to.
Social media, TV commercials and their friends at daycare, kinder or school all tell kids, ‘this is the new thing you need to be cool or to fit in”.
As a result, it’s easy for you as a parent to feel obligated to give to your child and soon your child will expect it.
Remember though, being entitled isn’t just detrimental when they’re young, it can carry over into adulthood.
According to a case from Western Reserve University, researchers conducted the study of long term consequences associated with entitled behavior and outlined it as a three-stage process:
- First, entitlement creates a constant vulnerability to unmet expectations.
- Unmet expectations then lead to dissatisfaction and other volatile emotions.
- Emotional distress demands a remedy, leading to the reinforcement of superiority.
So, what are the 5 signs that you are raising an Spoiled child?
- “Because I want it!”
How often do you hear this?
Can I have _________?
Because I want it?
How is this a good reason to buy our children anything and everything? Do they know the difference between want and need? So many of us parents are afraid to say no to our children and as soon as they push back we end up giving in
2. You do everything for them and they expect it
Not only do you do everything for your children but they expect it from you. It is so important for children to learn to take responsibility no matter how young they are. They make a mess, they need to clean it up. This is how they learn to stand on their own feet. The younger you start the easier it will be as it will just be a part of their routine.
3. An allowance isn’t earned
Are you giving your child an allowance whether they earn it or not? Do their friends get an allowance and you think they need to get it too? If you teach your children to “earn” their allowance this will go a very long way in teaching them cause and affect and to take responsibility.
4. “But everyone else has it!”
There are always going to be kids that have more, have better or have the latest and greatest. By giving in and letting your child keep up with the Joneses (or Kardashians) they will never learn what it’s like to appreciate what they have or work for what they want.
5. They don’t respect what they have
If children are not held accountable for their toys/possessions they are not learning responsibility and they may have the attitude that “you will just buy them another one” if they lose it or break it. They must respect and take care of their belongings.
In conclusion, when kids have a false sense of entitlement, they don’t see the world in real terms. Their view of the world will be, “If I want it, someone will give it to me”. The danger in this thinking and attitude is that they won’t know that they need to work towards a goal or that they need to make an effort to achieve some success in life.
The good news is that you can start teaching your child to take responsibility and what it really means to work and achieve their goals and aspirations.